Vlog: Life Happens

"Life is simple,  Everything happens for you, not to you.  Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late."  Byron Katie

I'm not sure I'd say life is simple because it can be quite difficult at times, but Katie's saying that everything happens for a reason, I do believe.  It' may not be appreciated at the time, it may not be comfortable to go through, but it is not to be resisted.  Resisting just makes things worse.  Remaining in the present and dealing with what happens moment to moment helps resolve issues faster and easier than fighting them or pretending they aren't happening at all.

"Life doesn't happen to you, it happens for you." Tony Robbins

Rather than freezing in fear and getting discouraged, use life experiences--good and bad--as a learning experience.  To grow and shine.  To live meaningfully.  To live the life you are meant to live.  To be the person you are meant to be.

For example, when I was born with spina bifida, I wasn't supposed to live past the age of six.  I'm not 56.  While, yes, I have had difficult times over the years, I also made a point to learn as much as I could about my chronic condition and how to care for myself.  I even, a three years of age, explained how to do a cut down, which is when a needle has to be sugically inserted into the vein.  I also learned to care for my foot ulcers at home until I could get to a doctor at a young age.  All sorts of things.  Also, I learned how to "find the funny" as I called it in whatever I was going through healthwise.  Not to make light of a serious situation, but to cope healthily with it.  And, take what I've been through, use spina bifida as a catalyst for empathy and caring for others.  

There is so much division in the world, but there is also lots of love.  You only have to look around you and on the news during this pandemic to find stories of total strangers reaching out to help each other.  Bad times can be sad, frightening, challenging, overwhelming, but they also can help us exhibit the best in ourselves, observe the best in others, find a new appreciation of our fellow human beings, learn, grow, and even totally transform our lives in ways we never imagined.

How have your life experiences affected you?  What have your learned about yourself and others so far during this pandemic?  What will you do with what you have learned?  

Stay safe.  Stay home.  Be well.

Vlog: A Possible Silver Lining

Hi there!  How are you doing?  I hope you are well.

This post is on the possible silver lining of Covid-19.  Now, I realize it is a serious matter.  My heart goes out to the victims and their families.  It's hard to think of there being a silver lining to something so devastating.  But, hear me out.

It seemed as if everyone was on their phones before Covid-19.  They were looking down at the phones behind the wheel, walking in the road, at parties, at the dinner table, paying more attention to their phones than the people around them.  But now there's social isolation, social distancing, and people are finding ways to get together in person or at least virtually.  People have even gathered together in large groups with the shelter in place and social distancing guidelines in place.  It makes me think that we do crave true togetherness in difficult times that the Internet can't replicate.  That's what makes social distancing so difficult, but so necessary at this time.  By keeping our distance, we help stop the spread,  keep each other healthy, and save lives.

When this crisis over let's hope that we remember the importance of in-person communication and connection.  Let's look forward to the time we will be able to truly enjoy those hugs, face to face conversations, and that closeness we may have previously taken for granted or even been averse to.  Or, at least let us make a point to stay connected virtually more often with friends and family we hardly ever did before this crisis.  

And, I hope we remember that technology has its place in society, as in difficult times like these, to keep us connected, but that it should not replace in-person contact.  There is room for both, and neither should be taken for granted or dismissed.  It's all a matter of balance.

Your thoughts?

Vlog: What I'm Doing To Stay Calm, Distracted, and Productive

Hi all!  I hope you are well.

I started out really nervous, frozen with fear over the coronavirus, then cleaning all the time and watching the news all the time.  That wasn't healthy.  I said, "Enough."

The game changer for me was a course I found on Udemy by Joeel and Natalie Rivera on dealing with stress and being more productive during this pandemic.  Perfect!  I have taken several of their  other courses and loved them.  This one was no different.  My mindset did a 180 degree turn.

I am still cautious.  I still watch local and national news for an hour a day, which is all I can handle.  And special bulletins whenever they come up.  But, I am not glued to the coverage.  That was driving me crazy.

I made a schedule, a routine that includes fun, work, and keeping informed about the latest on the virus.  It has made a big difference in my ability to cope with the uncertainty.

Some things I am doing:

• Coloring
• Reading
• Working on a new project regarding coaching
• Exercising
• Getting fresh air--gardening
• Watching Christmas movies 
• Watching favorite funny shows
• Good news videos online
• Doing breath work
• Taking courses on how to relieve stress
• Playing and cudfling with our cats
• Talking with friends
• Talking with my coaches
• Cleaning--reasonably
• Washing my hands often
• Getting good sleep
• Communicating with my husband--fears, concerns, other feelings and thoughts.
• Journaling

What are you doing to reduce stress in this uncertain time? 

I'm available for 30-minute free Instagram chats.  DM me @acnlifecoach.  No strings attached.  No sales pitch.  Just a chance to chat about your worries or simply chat about your interests and hobbies to get your mind off coronavirus for a bit.  I, of course, am also available for 45-minute discovery sessions to see if we would like to work together.  Comment here or email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com, or visit my website acnlifecoach.com, for more info.

Be well.

Vlog: Chronic Illness and Food and Unwelcomed Advice: Have The Confidence To Do What's Right For You

Do you have chronic health issues?

Do people give you a hard time or joke about how you eat?

Or, do they give you advice about what you should be eating instead?

I've had people comment  on cranberry juice.  I mix a medication with it.  They say, Oh, but all that sugar!  I get the 100% cranberry juice and mix it with water to get about 33% juice so it's not so strong.  It has no added sugar and about 9 grams of sugar total, compared to other brands that have much higher amounts of added sugar.  So, I'm promoting urinary system health and drinking a healthier version of cranberry juice in order to do so.  Some people choose to take cranberry supplements, but I just haven't taken to them.  

Green tea is another drink I get advice on.  It's so good for you!  I have been advised by my doctor, though, to limit green tea for health reasons (high blood pressure and osteoporosis, if my memory serves me correctly.  It's been awhile since I was told.  I'm not crazy about green tea--or any tea, really--anyway, so I just filed it in the "do not consume" column in my brain and that was that).  

Protein, too.  When I was working with trainers at the gym years ago, they showed some concern over the fact that I'm supposed to eat a low protein diet to help maintain kidney health.  They were respectful of it, but let me know that, without boosting my protein, I wouldn't be growing too much muscle.  They could work with what I had to firm things up, but not much was going to be built beyond that without extra protein.  I still eat fish, chicken and some pork, as well as other sources of protein without really measuring how much I take in. But, I don't take protein supplements. My test results are consistently within acceptable range using this method, so I must be doing something right.  

Get educated about your health issues, your body, and do what is right for you.

There is so much information available online and off.  If you have any questions about what you should and should not be eating, consult reliable sources for answers:  your doctor--or a team of doctors, registered dietician, respected, peer-reviewed medical journal articles, scientific studies, and others.   Choose wisely and make sure to back it up.

Have the confidence to eat what you need to and go without what you have to in order to take care of yourself.  Please don't feel guilty or weird for not taking others' advice when it could compromise your health.  It doesn't matter what Joe down the street does.  It doesn't matter what Molly from work eats.  We each have our unique nutritional needs.  

Briefly explaining it to the person who is giving advice or ribbing you about your food choices might help to educate them help them to better understand where you are coming from and get them off your back.  That is completely up to you.  It's your body.  It's your life.  It's your decision what to share and what not to share with others no matter the nature of your relationship.

If you have any questions or comments for me, leave them in the comments below or email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com.  Please note, though, that I am not a physician or registered dietician, so I cannot give medical advice.  See you back here next Sunday.  Have a great week!

The Twilight Zone: Loneliness and Exhilaration During Life Transition

Hey there!  I was hoping to get this post in last night, but it didn't happen.  I'm sorry about that.  Fighting another cold.  I just had a cold that hung on for five weeks starting in mid-November.  So, I am less than pleased about starting it all over again.  Hopefully this one doesn't last as long.  My husband had round two as well and it only lasted a short time.  Crossing fingers.  I'm not filming a video this time around since I'm not feeling up to it.  I'll resume videos when I feel better.

Now, onto the subject of this week's post.  

The definition of "lonely" is:  being without company or being cut off from others.

The definition of "alone" is:  separated from others.

There's a big difference between being alone and being lonely.  I love my alone time and generally prefer it to socializing, except with my closest friends.  Lonely is another story.  Lonely feels draining and isolating and even frightening.  With the changes that have taken place in the last couple years, I find myself both cherishing alone time to contemplate my life and what I want it to be going forward (including who I want to in my life and who I don't) and feeling uneasy about the changes that have occurred so far, and yes, feeling lonely.  It is difficult, yet necessary, to go through these life transitions.  They can force us to be real and teach us a lot about ourselves.

Do you feel lonely even surrounded by people?

Do you love being alone but also long for deep connections with a select few, or even one person?

Are you going through a tough transition in your life where you feel as if you have lost your safety net:  your friends, family, confidantes, and others?  By choice or not, or a bit of both?  

Do you feel alone in the gut-wrenching negative sense even though you love alone time?

Do you feel as if you are disoriented?  

Do you feel as if this change, however unsettling, was needed in order to make valuable changes to your life that can help you start fresh?

Do you feel that there is a purpose to this process and that it will turn out right in the end?

I can answer "yes" to all the above questions.  How about you?  Consider these questions as they relate to your life and personal transition.  

For me, the transition was a bit by choice and a bit not at all.  And it rocked my world.  I tell my husband that it feels like living in the twilight zone.  That may be an exaggeration, because some pretty cool stuff has happened too, but so many things have changed in the last couple of years that it does feel like the twilight zone sometimes.  

But I do feel there is a purpose for this change.  I needed this shake up to make the changes that will lead me to the life I was meant to live.

It is excruciatingly difficult to go through something like this, yet it is so vital to you. To honor your truth.  To be who you are and to be who you are meant to be.  You have to follow your truth in order to be happy and healthy and live a meaningful life.  Following others down their path doesn't work, and your gut will tell you so if you listen closely.  You'll feel uneasy, off, tired, awkward, bored, unfulfilled.  Your essential self, as Martha Beck discusses in her book, "Finding Your Own North Star," will throw a fit and it will do you very well to listen to it.  It knows what you need.

It could get messy and be very uncomfortable, and lonely, and unorganized, as I can attest being in the middle of it myself, but all that stuff is part of the process of becoming who you were meant to be.  

So, what can you do to make it through the process?  Cry, scream, complain, mourn, rest, eat healthy, eat what you want to just because you want to once in awhile, but also celebrate that you are taking charge of your life and making the changes that are most dear and most real to you.  Those changes you need to make and that feel so right you can't quite believe it's taken this long to make them.

What can you do to make the process less uncomfortable and scary?

• Feel your feelings, don't try to snuff them out or bury them deep within.  Journal about those feelings, related thoughts, actions you've taken and actions you plan to take.  Anything that you need to get out, organize, and process.
• Reach out to a coach, a counselor, or a therapist for support.
• Confide in a friend or family member who you are super close to and can trust.
• Join local support groups through your faith organization, hospital or other community agencies, or start your own.
• Join Facebook groups for loners and the lonely.
• Know that, though you feel lost and lonely and confused, you are not truly alone.  There are people who can help you.  There are people who have been down the path you are following and succeeded at finding the life they have always wanted, a meaningful life.  Reach out to those people who resonate most to you.  Reach out to agencies as well.  To helper who can guide you and support you through this difficult, yet necessary, and yes, even exciting (it can fill you with trepidation as well as pure joy to follow your true path), time in your life.
• And always remember, you have your inner voice, your inner guidance system, to steer you toward your truth.  Relying on yourself is the best way to find and live the life you were meant to live.  A fulfilling life.  The life you have always wanted.  Trust yourself, honor yourself, believe in yourself, and then, others will come into your life who can help you live that life you were meant to live.  Again, go with your gut, search for and accept help from those who you feel have your back and are trustworthy.
• It takes guts to do what you are doing.  Rely on yourself and select others to do it.
• And celebrate your turning from a caterpillar to a butterfly, living your truth in vibrant color.

I'd love to hear your stories of life transition or help you to build confidence to begin your own life transition.  Comment below or email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com.  Have an amazing, transformative week!

Vlog: Make Decisions With Confidence

Our thoughts, feelings, reactions--all influence our decisions.

Regarding our health, job, friendships, education, marriage, starting a family, bringing home a new pet, divorce, separation, a large purchase, a big move--big decisions--it is important to make them with confidence.

To gain that confidence, do the research.  

• What does your gut say?
• Is it right for you?
• Does it seem meaningful?
• Does it seem like a weight is lifting off your shoulders just thinking about it?
• Does it excite you?  Or, at least, does it give you some relief?
• Is it practical--can you afford it?
• Will it bring financial hardship?
• If so, how can you prepare ahead of time to ease the burden?
• Who can help?
  

These are just some of the questions to ask yourself.  I'm sure you can come up with others specifically suited to your situation.  Answering them will help you get clear on what you want, what's at stake and how you can move forward in a healthy, meaningful, and productive manner.

Are you faced with an important decision?  Do that research.  Listen to your gut. 

Or, have you made an important decision in the past?  What happened?  Did you tackle it with confidence?  

• Did it not turn out so well?  If so, what did you learn from the experience? 

or

• Did you succeed beyond your wildest dreams?  What have you done to keep up that momentum? 

I'd love to hear your experiences with decision making, and particularly how it was connected to your confidence level.   

Have an amazing week.  I'll catch you back here next Sunday.  Take care.

Vlog: Two Reasons To Celebrate

Hey there!  I hope you had a happy Valentine's Day weekend.  I like to think of it as a day (or weekend) to celebrate love of all types in our lives, not just romantic love.

If you have recently lost a loved one special occasions such as Valentine's Day can be tough.  I hope you have a strong support system to help you through this difficult time.

In other news, I finished my Amazon Associate links page on my website.  I worked all week on it and it now ready for viewing.  Check it out--> www.acnlifecoach.com/affiliate-links.  Let me know what you think.  And, if you have a suggestion for a product you would like me to include on my links page, let me know and I will consider it.  I welcome your input.  

Oh, one thing about my website:  mobile is not working great.  I will be doing some revisions on my site this week, so hopefully I'll be able fix the glitches.  If not, I will call tech support.  Thanks for your patience.

Have a great week.  Be open to new discoveries, laugh out loud fun, and quiet moments of contemplation.  See you back here next week.

Vlog: New Coaching Direction

Hey there!  I hope you're having a good week so far.  I'm here to talk about my new coaching direction.  (Video coming soon.)

I have concentrated on various coaching specializations in the past:

• chronic health issues
• special needs
• friendship
• teens
• individuals in business with chronic health issues
• and so on

I am now specializing in confidence coaching.  And, I have brought the arts in as coaching tools.

I am so excited about this!  With confidence, you can do anything.  Anything!!!  And, I have decided to utilize the arts as coaching tools because I have used the arts for as long as I can remember to help me through crises, and other unpleasant times in my life.  There is nothing like the arts to boost your spirits and gain insight.  And, don't worry, you don't have to be super artsy to use the arts in coaching.  You just have to be curious and willing to give it a whirl.  If it's not for you, no problem.  We can design your coaching sessions based on what works best for you.  Arts is just one of the tools available.       

The cool thing about my new coaching specialization is that it includes all of the above individuals and niches and more.  No matter what your circumstance, age, gender, social status, health status, work status and so on, you probably have dealt with confidence issues at one time or another.  We all do.  A lack of confidence can be numbing.  It can stop us dead in our tracks.  I know that especially when I was a teen navigating life with spina bifida, my confidence was at rock bottom.  I know how it feels to be there:  to feel like you don't fit in,  to be afraid of rejection, to not want to try something for fear of failure.  It feel horrible.  

That's why I decided to focus on being a confidence coach.  I want to help you get out of your own way, boost your confidence, and live the life of your dreams--a more meaningful life; a more satisfying life; a life of purpose.  I truly get goosebumps thinking about it.  It feels amazing to have found my purpose, and I would love to help you increase your confidence so you can move forward, do the things you have always wanted to do, go to the places you have always wanted to go, and live the life you were meant to live.

If you have any questions about my coaching services, don't hesitate to contact me:  amy@acnlifecoach.com.  For more information on my new coaching direction and how the arts fit into coaching, check out my website's FAQ page.  I also offer a 45-minute free session where you can ask questions, share what you'd like to be coached on, and get to know me and my coaching style a bit more.    Let's talk!

Vlog: Nature As Inspiration For Change

Hello!  I hope your week is starting out well.

Nature is always changing.  It's growing, it's alive.

Sometimes this happens very subtly so we can't even tell it's happening, while other times, such as in the case of tornadoes, earthquakes, wild fires, and hurricanes, it happens suddenly and violently.

That's us, too.  Sometimes we fight change and other times it comes easier.

You can go out in nature and find a quiet spot and think and heal and grow and have a-ha moments.

You can meditate, pain, draw, dance, laugh, cry, scream.

It can revitalize you.

The fresh air, the movement of your physical body, your heart and soul awakening.

It can energize you--give you the energy and the knowledge, and the self-awareness to make meaningful changes to your life.

What is your experience with nature?  Is it healing for you or do you have another way of tackling tough decisions, solving problems, and finding peace?

All the best!

I'm Back!: An Introduction

Hi everyone!  I'm back!  I'm so excited to start blogging again!  

First of all, thank you to my followers who stuck with me during the break even though I didn't post anything new.

And, thank you and welcome to those of you who recently started following my blog.  I'm glad you're here and hope you find my posts valuable.

I plan to write on a variety of topics related to confidence building, and also how the arts can serve as valuable tools to help bring about meaningful change in our lives.

Feel free to join in on the conversation, ask questions, and suggest topics for future posts.  I'd love to hear from you!

Okay, that's it for this time.  I hope you're having an amazing weekend.  I'll be posting again in the next couple of days.  Take care!

Last Post

Hi.  This is my last vlog post.  I have decided to end my blog and concentrate on YiuTube, Instagram, LinkedIn, and my Facebook Lives on my group Dream. Imagine. Believe. Achieve.  I will keep my blog up so you can have access to past posts.  Email me anytime with questions regarding posts or my coaching services.  amy@acnlifecoach.com.  My website is www.acnlifecoach.com.  You can find all the links to social media accounts there.  Best wishes.

Vlog: When Someone Believes In You

When someone believes in you:  What does that do for you?

• Helps you believe in yourself
• Fosters confidence building
• Builds self-respect
• Offers you hope
• Spurs you to seek out opportunities of self-fulfillment
• Gives you energy

Maybe you feel different, angry, nervous, or insecure.  Can you imagine what someone's belief in you would do for you?  Wow!  It could be life-changing.

But also, dig deep to find belief in yourself.

• You have to believe in yourself in order for your dreams to come true and your life to be fulfilling.
• Nobody can give that to you.  They can believe in you, but if that belief doesn't transfer to you, it won't do you any good.
• And you need to be ready to receive that belief and run with it and use it for good.

Do you have someone in your life who believes in you?  What has that done for your confidence, your self-respect, your productivity?

Who has believed in you?  A teacher, a parent, a spouse?  Maybe a friend, a member of the clergy, a boss?  Could be a doctor, nurse, therapist, a coach.  Who was it in your case?  I'd love to hear about them.

Vlog: Exercising With Chronic Health Issues

Hi there!  I got up early to exercise this morning.  I got a great workout exercising along to Leslie Sansone's Walk Away the Pounds 3-Mile DVD.  Yay!  When the alarm went off, I thought, oh no, but I got up, got going and was glad I did.  Her DVD's are adaptable, fun, and offer up a really good workout.  And, I'm being paid to say that!  I've been using her videos for years. 

Do you have chronic health issues?  If so, do you exercise?  Whether you can walk or not, in most cases there are exercises you can do.  Don't listen to the naysayers that discourage you because they think you're unable to exercise or that you'll just make a mistake and get hurt.  Please, you're not a two year old.  You know your body and that it's important to take care of it.   Listen to it and exercise!  But, please, the first thing you need to do is check with your doctor to see what exercises you can and cannot do relative to your chronic health issues.  Then pick exercises that are fun for you to do and take it slow.  You want to challenge yourself, yes, but you don't want to hurt yourself.  You may even want to talk with a personal trainer, exercise scientist, fitness coach, or physical therapist to get tips on where to start, what exercises to do, and so on.  You can also ask me questions if you like since I was a fitness coach for eight years.  I still know a thing or two about fitness.  And if I don't know the answer, I can refer you to someone who may be able to help you.  

Exercise doesn't just help you lose weight, it can reduce the risk of certain diseases, boost your mood, improve your sleep, and much more.  So, get out there, find out what you can and cannot do, and have fun--for life!

Vlog: Yes, You Can Work With Chronic Health Issues

Hey there!  I'm back after taking Fourth of July week off from vlogging.  Hope everyone celebrating it had a great time.

I've heard lots of people with spina bifida and other chronic health issues say they can't work, don't work because of their health.  This is surprising and discouraging.  I realize that your ability to work depends on the severity of your health problems, but in many cases, as long as you check with your doctor about what you can and cannot do, you should be able to work at some type of job.

Where can you work?

Home

• I've tutored English as a second language
• I had a typing and design business
• I wrote articles for Spina Bifida Association of America's magazine
• Fitness coach
• Life coach

All from home!

Office in town

Temp agency

• I spent about two years working at various businesses as a temp employee

In a coffee shop

• Take your laptop along and work from there.

In the park

At the library

• Take your laptop or Ipad along.  Maybe even reserve conference or meeting room there.

At a community center

• You can reserve a meeting room there to hold a workshop or other type of work-related event

At the kitchen table

• I tutor ESL students at my kitchen table!

On the phone

• Telemarketing
• Scheduling
• Life coaching
• Conducting polls and surveys
• Customer service
• Tech support

What can you do?  (Hint:  Pretty much anything!)

• Writing
• Blogging
• Billing
• Appointment scheduling
• Customer service
• Making crafts to sell on Etsy
• Coaching
• Bookkeeping
• Conducting surveys
• Mystery shopping
• Search engine evaluator
• Researching
• Photo editing 
• Copy editing
• Tutoring
• Mentoring
• See if your current boss will allow you to telecommute instead of traveling to the office every day.
• Virtual assistant
• Personal training/fitness coaching
• Tech support
• Quality control
• Social media manager

For more information, contact the following:

• Your state's vocational rehab agency for help   
• Your local job service or check out their website for job leads
• LinkedIn
• Monster.com
• National Telecommuting Institute (www.ntiathome.org/work-at-home-jobs-disabled.shtm
• LandaJob.org
• My Employment Options (https://www.myemploymentoptions.com
• FlexJobs.com:  https://www.FlexJobs.com/?sub=1037
• Freelancer.com
• Hubpages.com/eHow.com

A cautionary note:

• Look out for scams:  Avoid anything that seems fishy, have your lawyer look over contracts.
• Go with your gut when deciding which organizations you want to work for and jobs you want to do
• Get references before committing to anything
• Be careful when meeting prospective employers, contractors, clients in person.  Choose a public place.  Bring along a trusted friend or colleague to sit nearby in the park, restaurant or another meeting place of your choice just in case there is trouble and you need help.  At least tell someone close to you where you will be meeting this prospective client and when you plan to return.

Are you working?  Are you not?  What are your thoughts on working/not working with chronic health issues?

Vlog: Believe

I've been discussing my motto:  Dream.  Imagine.  Believe.  Achieve.  I've talked about dream and imagine.  Today, it's believe.  

The definition of "believe" is "to accept or regard as something that's true."  

So, how can believing help you get unstuck and go for your goals?

Well, you can start acting as if you already have it, made it, did it.  Your dream has come true.  Don't throw your money around just because you imagine yourself as a millionaire or successful businessperson.  That could get you into a lot of trouble.  You need to pay the rent, you need to act responsibly.  But you can visualize yourself as being successful.  You can believe that it will happen.  

Why is belief important?

• If you don't believe in yourself, no one else will.  And you may need people's help to follow your dreams.
• Belief breeds confidence that you need when t  The road gets rough.  You'll most likely face barriers along the way toward your dreams, but with confidence, you can overcome them.  You need belief for that.
• If you've seen others do something you know it can be done.  To believe that you can do it is key to doing it yourself.
• Belief inspires you to take action.  You know you can do it so let's get going.  And you won't give up until you succeed.
• It helps you form a positive attitude.  Attitude is everything when going for your goals.  You need to have a positive attitude to accomplish anything.  To achieve anything.  

Achieve is the final portion of my motto.  Dreaming, imagining, and believing can lead to achievement.  

• You may fail repeatedly but belief keeps you going, trying again.  You know this is what you are meant to do.  Help people, for example.  That was me.  I've tried lots of stuff--I wanted to be a psychologist and play therapist.  I didn't do it.  But, years later, I've found coaching.  I've always wanted to help people, ever since I was very young.  Nothing else clicked, but coaching did.  And tutoring English as well as an off-shoot.  I am helping people.  It doesn't matter that I didn't go for the masters and doctorate.  It matters that I kept looking for what was right for me; the way in which I could help people best.   And, I've found it.  It took awhile, but I found it.  And that's okay.  Your true self--your true calling--may take awhile to come forth, but it will.  Give it time.  Then work for it, embrace it, love it, enjoy it.

What are your dreams?  Do you believe in yourself and your ability to achieve them?  

Vlog: Daydreaming Pros and Cons

I have used daydreaming for stress relief for most of my life:  from about age 8 years to my early 20s.  I've used it since then as well, just not as much.  I probably used it too much as an escape early on, but I truly do feel that it helped me cope.

There are pros and cons associated with daydreaming.  

First, the Pros:

• Helps you get creative:  I do this with writing, disappearing into that world--getting into "the zone."  Creativity can also help you relax, find new solutions to problems you may never have thought of otherwise.
• Helps you understand where someone is coming from; empathize:  Daydreaming can help you think how it is for your family and friends when you have to cancel due to health issues or some other reason.  It can also help you feel more connected to those family and friends who live far away. Research shows that daydreaming/fantasizing can cause similar reactions to those you would experience in reality while in the same situations.  Excited.  Frightened.  Calm.  Refreshed.  Sad.  How cool is that?
• De-stress through letting go:  Giving yourself a little break from constant worry, medication schedules, doctors' appointments, physical therapy and so on by daydreaming.  It can aid healing and improve your wellness by boosting your immune system and the overall way you feel.
• Clarity and better memory:  Daydreaming can help you think more clearly and better remember new information.  This is excellent news for those of you who are facing meeting a new doctor or new diagnosis.  For planning, organizing and performance at work, too.  Use it to go into any new situations with more confidence.  

Now, the Cons:

• Distraction:  Daydreaming can take your attention away from learning, work, chores, family, and so on.  It makes retrieving information more difficult, say, if you're reading or taking a test.
• Unhappiness:  If you daydream about negative things you could become more unhappy.  If you daydream about positive things, it doesn't seem to help you become happier.  It all depends on your view of your daydream experience and the topic.  Go into it realizing that it is only a tool that can help you temporarily zone out and relieve stress.  Use it for good rather than bad.  
• Staying in a dream world:  If you stay in the dream world and can't function in the real one; if you avoid socializing with friends and family, chronically miss work or school to spend time daydreaming, it's important for you to recognize this as unhealthy and seek help from a healthcare professional.    
• Putting people on a pedestal: If you imagine a person to be a certain way in your daydreams, it could negatively affect your life and even be dangerous.  For example, if you're in an abusive relationship and disappear into your daydreams as an escape, and while there imagine that the person is really amazing and loving, and then come back to reality and convince yourself that this same person is really kind and deserves your love even though they are abusive toward you, that is not healthy.  On the flip side, you could also go into your dream world and imagine doing terrible things to someone in your life you dislike strongly, although they are basically a decent person. That will not help foster understanding or a healthy relationship with that person in reality.

You absolutely can learn to use daydreaming as a tool to get you through the tough times.  Just remember to use it for good and not stay there.  

Do you use daydreaming to cope with chronic health issues or other problems?  Has it hurt?  Has it helped?  Let me know.  Thanks.  See you back here next week.  

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Frontiers in Psychology:  Pros and Cons of a Wandering Mind: A Prospective Study

  

Vlog: Part 2: Using Your Imagination To Manage Stress

Hi! I'm back to bring you the second part of my vlog on imagination.  In the first part, I talked about how I have used imagination to relieve stress throughout my life.  In today's vlog, I talk about how imagination can help you and how to actually tap into your imagination.  Here we go.  

How can imagination help you?

Stress relief:  Some stress is good.  It challenges you to get things done, meet deadlines, grow/change for good, and so on.  But getting too stressed out can be harmful to your health.  Stress can cause:

• physical symptoms
• missed work due to illness
• psychological symptoms
• relationship issues and more.  It can touch all areas of your life.

Using imagination for good:  While imagination can cause disease, it also can heal.  You may worry yourself sick (literally) about money, tests, surgery, relationships--even about getting sick!  How about using it for good instead to: 

• see the big picture 
• relieve stress 
• work out problems/find solutions
• practice conversations with doctors, bosses, friends, teachers, family, lawyers, insurance agents--anyone  
• get relief from the negativity that's bogging you down either in your head or from others 
• improve your emotional and mental well being

So, how do you do this?  

How do you practice imagining to reap the benefits of it?

• Ask yourself what imagination would do for you that's positive
• Make room for imagination in your life
• Use active imagination, which was created by Carl Jung, to connect the conscious and sub-conscious. Examples are dream interpretation, visualization, and daydreaming.  You can imagine an army representing the immune system fighting the disease, or enemy.  Or you can imagine a meadow of wildflowers or the seashore that is calming.  You can also use meditation to bring yourself to a safe place in which to work out problems that cause fear.  And how about viewing your health issue as a movie?  What do you see?  How do you feel?  How did you get this health issue?  What can you do to ease the symptoms or recover?  
• Commit to taking action based on what you learned from your imagination
• Do more of what you love (sing, exercise, eat your favorite foods, place fresh flowers throughout the house), in order to attract positive energy.  This positive energy sharpens your critical thinking and decision-making skills, which you need in order to solve problems and reduce stress.
• Keep a lookout for signs, symbols, and synchronicity.  For example, when I'm feeling down and I see a cloud in the shape of a feather, I take it as a sign that my guardian angel has my back since the feather is a sign that your guardian angel is nearby.
• Make sure to review what you're doing to see what works and what doesn't.  Make adjustments as needed.

It is very important to become aware of what you need in order to facilitate change.  Go within yourself, using your imagination, to help you find out.  

PNI

Robert Ader, a psychologist, and Nicholas Cohen, an immunologist, came up with the term psychoneuroimmunology.  What's that all about?  Let's take a look:

• The idea behind the big name is that the mind can activate specific neurological processes which in turn can stimulate the immune system to suppress illness and improve health.  Yay, I love it!
• And, as I mentioned earlier, while the mind's reaction to stress can stunt immunity and promote illness, visualization, imagination, and such can stimulate the immune system to better fight disease.  Who-hoo!  

Okay, here are more ways to tap into this awesome thing called imagination:

• relax
• get a clear image of your immune system fighting your disease--whatever health issue you're dealing with.  This could be an army fighting an enemy, a bunch of big fish representing your immune system devouring a bunch of other fish representing your disease or another stressor, or a stream of light that surrounds you and fills you with healing energy.

Here's the but, and a counter but

All this isn't backed by copious amounts of research, but it can be used safely as a part of your healthcare plan in conjunction with your traditional medical treatments and therapies.  It can't hurt you to use your imagination for good.  The only way it could hurt you is if you decided to live in your imaginary world and never deal with reality.  Try it to ease your mind and stress lwhen you most need it and see how you feel.  See if it helps.  And, if it does, which has been true in my case, wow!  Imagine, with more solid research data, what a wonderful feeling it would be to have your doctor actually prescribe imagination as a potential treatment for what's ailing you!  

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Resources:  www.psychologytoday.com and www.goodtherapy.org

Vlog: Using Your Imagination To Relieve Stress and Promote Healing, Part 1

Hi all!  I'm back from vacation.  We had a good time in California celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary and visiting a friend.  

This vlog is a summary of how I used imagination to relieve stress throughout my life, especially during my early years.  

• I invented an imaginary world in my bedroom from as far back as I can remember where I was healthy, strong, talented, popular, married, a mom, working at a job I loved, and so on.  
• I worked out problems
• Practiced conversations that I would have with doctors, teachers, family members, friends, and job interviewers
• I was creative: drawing, painting, singing, dancing, writing for hours on end.
• It freed me from the stress, provided an escape, at least temporarily
• It helped me build confidence

I did overdo it a bit as I got into my teens, spending as much time as possible in my sanctuary.  That probably wasn't as healthy as tempered imagination would have been, but I say it still benefited me and may have saved my life.  I was very insecure, lost, depressed throughout my childhood as a result of dealing with my chronic health issues, surgeries, pain, doctor's appointments, therapies, and so on.  And I hated using a wheelchair.  I felt like it made me stick out rather than giving me freedom and mobility.  The imaginary world I created gave me a much-needed break from the stress.

In Part 2, I'll talk about how imagination can ease stress and promote healing as well as how to actually tap into your imagination and use it for good rather than negative means.  

Do you use your imagination for stress relief?  Or do you use it to worry, imagining the worst?  What type of results have you seen?

Part 2 will be coming soon.   Take care.

Vlog: All You Can Do Is Your Life

You can:

• Wake up feeling every ache and pain but determined to help others.
• Put others first.
• Ignore the voice inside; your gut that says you've done enough. You are enough.
• Be angry, sad, lonely, tired, frustrated, hurt, insulted, fearful, ashamed due to your health issues and the reactions of others toward those issues.
• Try to be everything to everyone.
• Sit alone, staring at the wall feeling sorry for yourself.
• Stay in an unhealthy relationship because you think no one else will want you.

OR

You can:

• Wake up and decide to tackle the day with determination, enthusiasm, grace, patience, positivity, getting real, productivity, doing, being, putting one foot in front of the other.
• Try, fail, take the breaks you need, try again, maybe succeed next time, thrive, live life to the fullest.
• Help yourself so you can help others.
• Live a life you can smile and be happy about.

Which option sounds the healthiest to you?

Which life do you want to lead?

Which life have you led up to now?

What changes do you need to make to live your best life?  

You can, you know . . . live your best life.  The best that you know is inside you.

Whatever that is.  You find that within you.

Are you ready?  Get started.

• Little by little
• Bit by bit
• Step by step

What does it mean to you to live your life?

How can you make changes to live a fulfilling life?

Have you already made them?  How did it go?

Email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com or comment below.  

I may or may not have a post next week.  I'm taking next week off and plan to unplug as much as possible.  So, let's just plan on meeting again back here in a couple weeks.  

Take care!  Tomorrow is June already!  Wow!  I hope you have so fun summer plans.  

Vlog: Medication Advertisements: Helpful...Or Not?

Hi there, all!  I hope you're having a good weekend so far.  

Medication advertisements with every symptom and side effect known to man.  Do you find this helpful or frightening, or unnecessary?

Let's look at the topic more closely:

The positives:  They give you lots of information about the medication, so you then can decide from there whether or not you want to contact your doctor about it.

The negatives:  They tell you all this stuff that may turn you off from even asking your doctor about it, or considering taking it for something it could really people alleviate.

What would be better?:  

• Talk to your doctor or pharmacist to get information on the advertised medication.
• Leave out the side effects and such from the advertisement and leave it to your doctor to tell you that information specific to your situation.
• Talk to your doctor or pharmacist about any medication you have questions about before taking it.
• Consider natural medicine:  Combine it with modern medicine, massage, herbs, acupressure, acupuncture, energy medicine/therapy, hypnosis, meditation, and more.

Please don't:

• take any new medication without first consulting a qualified healthcare professional.  
• take others' medication that was not prescribed to you.
• take medication in the amount other than the recommended dosage.
• keep taking a medication if you experience troubling side effects.  Call your doctor or pharmacist, call 9-1-1, or go to the nearest emergency room immediately.
• take medications you are unsure of.  You know your body better than anyone else.  Listen to it.  Work with your doctors to find the best treatment for your health issues.

What do you think of medication advertisements?  Have you ever asked your doctor about a medication you found out about through an advertisement?