Vlog: Part 2: Using Your Imagination To Manage Stress

Hi! I'm back to bring you the second part of my vlog on imagination.  In the first part, I talked about how I have used imagination to relieve stress throughout my life.  In today's vlog, I talk about how imagination can help you and how to actually tap into your imagination.  Here we go.  

How can imagination help you?

Stress relief:  Some stress is good.  It challenges you to get things done, meet deadlines, grow/change for good, and so on.  But getting too stressed out can be harmful to your health.  Stress can cause:

• physical symptoms
• missed work due to illness
• psychological symptoms
• relationship issues and more.  It can touch all areas of your life.

Using imagination for good:  While imagination can cause disease, it also can heal.  You may worry yourself sick (literally) about money, tests, surgery, relationships--even about getting sick!  How about using it for good instead to: 

• see the big picture 
• relieve stress 
• work out problems/find solutions
• practice conversations with doctors, bosses, friends, teachers, family, lawyers, insurance agents--anyone  
• get relief from the negativity that's bogging you down either in your head or from others 
• improve your emotional and mental well being

So, how do you do this?  

How do you practice imagining to reap the benefits of it?

• Ask yourself what imagination would do for you that's positive
• Make room for imagination in your life
• Use active imagination, which was created by Carl Jung, to connect the conscious and sub-conscious. Examples are dream interpretation, visualization, and daydreaming.  You can imagine an army representing the immune system fighting the disease, or enemy.  Or you can imagine a meadow of wildflowers or the seashore that is calming.  You can also use meditation to bring yourself to a safe place in which to work out problems that cause fear.  And how about viewing your health issue as a movie?  What do you see?  How do you feel?  How did you get this health issue?  What can you do to ease the symptoms or recover?  
• Commit to taking action based on what you learned from your imagination
• Do more of what you love (sing, exercise, eat your favorite foods, place fresh flowers throughout the house), in order to attract positive energy.  This positive energy sharpens your critical thinking and decision-making skills, which you need in order to solve problems and reduce stress.
• Keep a lookout for signs, symbols, and synchronicity.  For example, when I'm feeling down and I see a cloud in the shape of a feather, I take it as a sign that my guardian angel has my back since the feather is a sign that your guardian angel is nearby.
• Make sure to review what you're doing to see what works and what doesn't.  Make adjustments as needed.

It is very important to become aware of what you need in order to facilitate change.  Go within yourself, using your imagination, to help you find out.  

PNI

Robert Ader, a psychologist, and Nicholas Cohen, an immunologist, came up with the term psychoneuroimmunology.  What's that all about?  Let's take a look:

• The idea behind the big name is that the mind can activate specific neurological processes which in turn can stimulate the immune system to suppress illness and improve health.  Yay, I love it!
• And, as I mentioned earlier, while the mind's reaction to stress can stunt immunity and promote illness, visualization, imagination, and such can stimulate the immune system to better fight disease.  Who-hoo!  

Okay, here are more ways to tap into this awesome thing called imagination:

• relax
• get a clear image of your immune system fighting your disease--whatever health issue you're dealing with.  This could be an army fighting an enemy, a bunch of big fish representing your immune system devouring a bunch of other fish representing your disease or another stressor, or a stream of light that surrounds you and fills you with healing energy.

Here's the but, and a counter but

All this isn't backed by copious amounts of research, but it can be used safely as a part of your healthcare plan in conjunction with your traditional medical treatments and therapies.  It can't hurt you to use your imagination for good.  The only way it could hurt you is if you decided to live in your imaginary world and never deal with reality.  Try it to ease your mind and stress lwhen you most need it and see how you feel.  See if it helps.  And, if it does, which has been true in my case, wow!  Imagine, with more solid research data, what a wonderful feeling it would be to have your doctor actually prescribe imagination as a potential treatment for what's ailing you!  

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Resources:  www.psychologytoday.com and www.goodtherapy.org

Vlog: Using Your Imagination To Relieve Stress and Promote Healing, Part 1

Hi all!  I'm back from vacation.  We had a good time in California celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary and visiting a friend.  

This vlog is a summary of how I used imagination to relieve stress throughout my life, especially during my early years.  

• I invented an imaginary world in my bedroom from as far back as I can remember where I was healthy, strong, talented, popular, married, a mom, working at a job I loved, and so on.  
• I worked out problems
• Practiced conversations that I would have with doctors, teachers, family members, friends, and job interviewers
• I was creative: drawing, painting, singing, dancing, writing for hours on end.
• It freed me from the stress, provided an escape, at least temporarily
• It helped me build confidence

I did overdo it a bit as I got into my teens, spending as much time as possible in my sanctuary.  That probably wasn't as healthy as tempered imagination would have been, but I say it still benefited me and may have saved my life.  I was very insecure, lost, depressed throughout my childhood as a result of dealing with my chronic health issues, surgeries, pain, doctor's appointments, therapies, and so on.  And I hated using a wheelchair.  I felt like it made me stick out rather than giving me freedom and mobility.  The imaginary world I created gave me a much-needed break from the stress.

In Part 2, I'll talk about how imagination can ease stress and promote healing as well as how to actually tap into your imagination and use it for good rather than negative means.  

Do you use your imagination for stress relief?  Or do you use it to worry, imagining the worst?  What type of results have you seen?

Part 2 will be coming soon.   Take care.

Vlog: Being Told You're An Inspiration

Have you been told you're an inspiration?  What was the reason?  Did they give you any specifics as to why they thought you were inspirational?  

And, how did you feel about it?  How did you respond?  Did it inspire you to do more for others?  More for yourself?  Did it help you break out of your comfort zone and try something new?  Did it inspire you to become a speaker, letting other people know about your chronic health issues; to become an advocate for others?

Or, did you feel like a fraud?  They were inspired by you but you may feel as if you really haven't lived up to it.  You are unsure of yourself, you're self-conscious, perhaps.  Insecure.

What do you do with this?  How can being called an inspiration change that negativity in you to positivity?  How can it energize you?

When someone calls you an inspiration, what should you say?  Well, here are some ideas:

• Simply say "Thank You."
• Ask the person how you inspire them
• Tell the person how they inspire you.

How can you use your inspiration?

• Speak about it at local organizations, schools, hospitals, health fairs
• Do volunteer work at hospitals, schools, shelters, community events, health fairs
• Help others with similar health issues to cope, improve their situation, and be inspired.
• Write about it in a blog or book
• Write a column for your local newspaper on coping with health issues
• Contact the association connected to your chronic health issues to see if you could write articles for their newsletter or magazine.

Any other ideas?  I'd love to hear from you!  And, please share your experiences with this topic.  Have you been told you're an inspiration?  How did you react?  Positively?  Negatively?  Let's talk about this.  

Vlog: Time Management Tips

Sorry about the background noise in the video, first of all.  It came through more than I had hoped.  

Do you have a problem managing your time?

Do you try to juggle work, school, family obligations, exercising, chores, meal planning, healthy eating, medication schedules, doctor appointments, surgeries scheduling, therapy sessions, pet care....on and on and on?

Stop.

Try these tips for taking the mystery and the headaches out of time management:

• Make a list of the things you must do.
• Make a list of the things you'd like to do.
• Get a big calendar or use Google Calendar--any calendar will do, really.  I just like big calendars.  :-)
• Put these "must do's" on the calendar.
• Next, go to your list of things you would like to do and fit them in around the "must do's."

Okay, now that you've done that, you may be thinking, "I still don't know if I can do this."  Seek help.

-Seek out help from your family:

• delegate some tasks to your spouse, parent, child, or other family members living in the home
• ask for rides to doctor's appointments, job interviews, concert venues, and the like
• ask for help to figure out how you can actually make your plans happen

-Seek out help from your boss:

• see if your work schedule can be rearranged to better accommodate your health maintenance needs
• see if you could delegate some responsibilities if you feel overwhelmed
• ask for accountability if you are having a hard time getting motivated to tackle a project

-Seek out help from the medical community:

• get a medication schedule from your pharmacist
• ask your doctor what you can and can't do as far as exercise goes
• ask for ways to be more efficient.  Are you doing things you don't have to do?  
• ask for accountability for the things that you must do

-Seek out help from friends:

• ask if they would be willing to drive you to an interview or doctor's appointment
• ask if they would be willing to act as your sounding board
• ask if they would comfort you
• ask if they would be willing to help you make your dreams come true 
• ask if they would be willing to take on tasks 
• ask if they would be willing to take on some tasks that are bogging you down
• ask for accountability for the things you really want to do for fun or to lose weight

-Seek out help from teachers:

• see if you can possibly do an assignment differently that you're struggling with
• see if you can get extra help from a tutor
• see if you can possibly change your schedule, take different classes
• see if you can be held accountable for a specific assignment by the teacher

-Cut out things you don't need to do

• you may tend to overload yourself with unnecessary expectations

-Spend less time online

-Find APPS that keep you accountable

• Smarter Time
• MyEffectiveness
• aTimeLogger

-Join accountability groups online or locally

My big thing is lists.  I make lists for everything--work, travel, meals, activities, you name it.  Also, my husband, Jim, helps me a lot at home so I can concentrate on my health maintenance and coaching.

Medical appointments are a given.  I hardly ever miss one.  I make time for them, always.  

The areas I'm working on the most are fitting in exercise and also scheduling meals.  Scheduling meals is a tough one because both our schedules are pretty hectic, but it is extremely important to do so because my medication is tied to food.  Either I have to take meds with or without food.  

What are your biggest time management issues?  

Vlog: Marriage and Chronic Health Issues

I posted a video on my Facebook group page (Spina Bifida Support Group For Friends and Family) in which the young woman talked about marriage inequality for those with disabilities.  Benefits may get cut if the disabled person marries, so it makes it harder for those individuals to afford to get married.  

It gave me the idea to talk about other areas of marriage and chronic health issues.

First, let's back up a bit.

The people you surround yourself with--who are they?  

The friends:

• Are they supportive?
• Are they understanding
• Are they loving?
• Do they 'get' you?

That's where you're going to most likely find your spouse--among your friends.  Or maybe they aren't in your core group of friends, but they become a friend.  You may meet the person:

• at work
• at school
• at church
• at the gym
• at a community club--exercise club, wine club, etc.
• through other friends
• through family
• at a party
• at an event
• at the hospital

Make sure before you get married you talk about EVERYthing:

• Your medical problems
• Your medical costs
• Your healthcare needs
• Money, money, money, MONEY!  If there is one fight maker in a marriage, it's money.  Talk about it.  It's important!  How will you manage your money?  Will you seek the advice of a financial advisor?  Can you make it on your combined incomes?  On one income?
• Communicate your feelings regarding these issues and each other's expectations.
• What are you willing to compromise on and what are you not?
• Mutual friends, your friends, his/her friends, ex-girlfriends, ex-boyfriends.  If you want to stay in touch with certain close friends after the marriage, then say so up front.  Be honest about the fact that you have an ex who you think the world of AS A FRIEND and you don't want to lose touch with the person.  Be honest so your future spouse doesn't start wondering if he/she will lose you to an old flame.
• Family--yours, his/hers, and your relationship with them
• Do you expect to spend a lot of time with your family after the wedding?  Do you expect your spouse to put you first before his/her birth family?
• Are there any conversations you need to have regarding how your future spouse's family treats you?
• Does his/her family approve of you, think you will be a financial burden, cherish you?  Are they really awesome?
• Does your future spouse not have a close relationship with his/her family?  Do you?  And does it make a difference?
• Does he/she treat your family badly...or fantastically?
• Does your future spouse act inconvenienced or angry when you cancel dates and plans because of health issues?  (Total red flag.  Drop the jerk and head for the hills.)
• Does the future spouse treat you with respect?
• Does he/she show interest in your health issues--curiosity, wanting to know about all sorts of things related to it, etc.?
• Does he/she seem to resent your medical bills? (Another red flag)
• Does he/she have confidence in you?  Does he/she feel that you can do anything you set your mind to?  (That's a keeper, folks!)
• Does he/she show empathy?
• Does he/she seem romantic?  Does he/she do simple, nice things for you?
• Do you talk about possible changes in your health?
• Do you talk about the future?
• Do you talk about both your dreams and his/hers?  Do they jive?
• Do you talk about taking healthy breaks from each other?  Getaways?  Weekends? Girls' nights out with friends?
• Do you talk about wanting to spend time together, just the two of you--no family, no friends, no co-workers?  How does that go over?
• Do you talk about having kids?  Can you have children?  Do you want children?  Does he/she want children?  What about adoption or surrogacy?
• Are either of you big into career advancement? 
• Do you expect to continue your education after marriage?
• What hours do you prefer to work?  What kinds of hours do you put in?
• What are your interests?
• Do you have expensive taste?  Does he/she?  Are you alike or opposite in that regard?
• Will you're future spouse put your medical needs ahead of fun stuff like cars, travel, jewelry, a big house, a vacation house?  
• Who does what chores?  Or do you share it all?
• Do you want pets?  Is he/she allergic?

Can you relate to these things?  Did you talk about them before you married?  What else can you think of that's important to talk about?  How did you decide to marry your spouse?  Has your marriage worked out?  Has talking worked out?  If so, great.  If not, what do you do differently now?

Here's the link to my other group:  Fostering Friendships Group For Individuals With Chronic Health Issues

Vlog: Crying Is Healthy

Crying is often seen as shameful or a weakness.  But, it can actually be healthy.

According to WebMD, Some psychologists say we are cheating ourselves by avoiding crying, holding it back, keeping our emotions inside.  Why?

Benefits of crying

Well, crying:

• activates the body in a healthy way
• opens us up
• releases stress
• promotes mental health
• relaxes muscles
• activates the parasympathetic nervous system (This is part of the autonomic nervous system.  Functions include sexual arousal, waste removal, digestion, and saliva stimulation.)
• regulates the body's balance

Also, emotional tears have more stress hormones than other types of tears, such as those that lubricate and those that come along when we get something in our eye.  These tears have more mood-boosting manganese.

Where should you cry?

So, where do health professionals recommend you cry?  That is a personal choice, but they generally recommend finding a quiet place to cry such as a special sanctuary, someplace in nature, or a quiet room.

If you would rather find comfort with others, cry on a loved one's shoulder or attend a crying group.  Yep, that's right, there are crying groups where you can go and cry together with a lot of other people.  While the source I used mentioned a group in Japan, you may decide to start your own crying group right in your local community.  

Whatever you do, don't give yourself a hard time for crying.  Here are tips from Psychology Today: 

• cry for yourself and others.
• cry at what sets off tears, however small or big.
• cry for as long as you see fit.  Look inside and you will know how long you need.
• look inside for the cause of the tears so you can figure out how to take action to solve it.
• if you can't cry right away due to your location (say you are in the middle of a meeting at work), set aside time later in the day to revisit your emotions.  The tears may or may not come, but that is okay.
• be kind to yourself in relation to your crying.  Don't blame yourself or poo-poo the situation.  For example, avoid saying, "I'm so weak," or "I'm crying over nothing."

Whether to cry in public is your choice.  Some professionals say it may be healthy.  Strangers are generally receptive to crying and offer comfort rather than shying away in fear.  But others say to seek a quiet, private place to shed tears.  Do whatever feels right to you.

A note of caution

If you can't get relief from or stop crying, seek help from your healthcare provider.

When I was a small child, I refused to cry when I was in pain or scared in the hospital.  The result?  A stomach ulcer at the age of three.  Yes, three.  This is serious business, folks.  If you hold your emotions in, you could face serious health consequences.  When the doctors discovered the ulcer, they told me that from then on, I should scream and cry if I was feeling bad.  I have taken their advice ever since.

So, do you cry over your health problems, pain, other people's pain, hurt feelings, disappointments, or when you are afraid?  Or do you keep everything inside?  

Be the Victor, Not the Victim

When it comes to your health issues, are you a victor or a victim?  Take a look at the characteristics below and decide which one you most identify with.


Characteristics of a Victim

• The world is against me
• Any challenge is an unsurmountable obstacle
• I blame others for my failures
• I have a negative attitude
• I make excuses
• I am pessimistic
• I see only closed doors
• I give up quickly if I don't succeed

Characteristics of a Victor

• I can be of service to the world
• I consider an obstacle an opportunity
• I am responsible for my successes and failures
• I have a positive attitude
• I see only open doors
• I am optimistic
• I don't give up until I succeed

Me:  A Bit of Both, and Working To Improve

As a very young child, I started learning self-care.  I also watched doctors and nurses carefully as they performed health maintenance and various procedures.  I learned all I could about the medical world as it pertained to me.  That part was pretty cool.  It helped lessen my fear of those surroundings that were a regular part of my life.  The part that wasn't so cool was that my parents tended to shelter me, so:

• I can't do anything for myself (other than medical stuff, of course--that I knew)
• I can't get involved with family activities because I might get hurt
• I can't participate in gym class because I might get hurt, look foolish
• I can't go play with other kids because I don't fit in, I'm too slow

My anger grew as I got a little older.  I hated having health issues, being stared at, being pitied, being different, being limited, being afraid to do things on my own, my parents' coddling, not hanging out with my peers, but I was a good girl so I never let anyone see that side of me.  I kept it inside.  When I hit my teens, things changed.  All that bottled up anger came flooding out:

• I resent my family
• I resent the world
• I resent my peers for being healthy
• I resent myself for being different, broken
• I can't get involved in community
• I can't learn to drive because I might get into an accident
• I can't get involved in school activities because I don't fit in, I'm not good enough
• I can't make really close friends because I "need" to keep so much of myself private
• I will never have a boyfriend because I'm broken, too different, ugly
• I resent myself for thinking all of these things but I can't help it

Luckily, things started turning around when I was about 15.  Otherwise, I am convinced I wouldn't be here.  I was deeply troubled and something had to give.  Someone would have to intervene and help me, or I would be dead.  Someone intervened.  It totally changed my life.

• I joined school clubs
• I volunteered at school and in the community
• I made friends
• Fell in love
• I traveled without my parents
• I went to school dances, including the prom
• I went to school dressed as a Smurf for Halloween (I kid you not.  I would never have even thought of doing such a thing before.)
• I got more involved at home, doing more chores on the family farm
• I went for walks and participated in other activities with my family

Since then there have been ups and downs.  

• Indecision regarding college studies.  (I'm just now figuring out what I really want and love to do) 
• Insecurities about abilities related to work
• Some pretty cool jobs, and the realization that I prefer working from home.  Not to avoid work, but to enhance it.  Make it work for me.
• Marriage
• More travel
• More volunteering
• More friends
• A couple major moves to other parts of the country 
• Old and new health issues to deal with

But basically, things are going well.

How to Be a Victor

• Remember that any change begins with you
• Have healthy conversations with family and friends about issues that are bothering you
• Pick one thing in your life that you will start to react differently, more positively, to
• Put visual reminders up around your home or in your car to help you think more positively
• Learn to say "I'm sorry," or "I'm wrong," --and mean it--when you mess up
• Say "I can" or "I will"
• Contact local organizations to see if they would be interested in scheduling you to speak at one of their meetings or other events on a subject related to your health issues (advocacy, awareness)
• Make a list of things you would love to try, then set out to do them  (a new hobby, vacation destination, sport, activity, class, social club, or maybe living on your own)
• Surround yourself with positive people who believe in your abilities
• Talk to your doctor about any questions or concerns you have

As you begin to change your mindset from victim to victor, you will experience ups and downs, but keep at it.  It takes time to adopt the attitude of a victor, but you'll get there.  Step by step, you'll make the changes necessary to live a happier, more positive life.

So, do you identify more with the victor or the victim?  If you exhibit more victim-like characteristics, what can you do to make a more positive shift?  

  

Coaching Niches: How I Came To Choose Special Needs/Abilities and Friendship (Part 1)

There are many coaching niches: career, ADHD, stay-at-home moms, relationships...on and on.  When I went searching for ideas, I couldn't believe the variety.  But none jumped out at me; none felt right.  So, I turned to myself and what I had experience in and a passion for.  First, I came up with special needs, and fitness, then fitness was replaced by friendship.  So, now I have two unique niches that I am knowledgeable in and passionate about.  Perfect!  Here's how I chose them, starting with special needs.  Friendship will be covered in part 2.

Special Needs/Abilities

As I've mentioned before, I was born with spina bifida.  I've dealt with health issues all my life.  I know what it's like to deal with the medical world.  It can be daunting and demoralizing.  It can also be inspiring and celebratory.  For example, meeting doctors who care enough to fight for you every step of the way, or those who celebrate your little victories to help keep your spirits up through the long process of recovery laced with setbacks.  And then there are the family members and friends who never give up on you, no matter how many times you are sick with an infection, or have to have surgery, or complain about the crappy hand you were dealt.  It is a tough road, no question about it.  But, I've been able to navigate the medical maze that is part of my lifestyle with a fair amount of success, and I wanted to help others do the same. 

I'd always wanted to help people in some way.  I started out with the idea of studying English with aspirations of being a writer.  I thought I would write articles that would shed light on the special needs community, point out where improvements could be made regarding perceptions of those with health issues, and write books featuring characters with special needs.  But I nixed that and switched to psychology, then I switched to developmental disabilities, then sociology.  Then I turned off that road to study business but always worked in offices geared toward helping others such as social service agencies and educational programs. 

 In the early 1990s, I started my own typing and design business (combining my two loves of writing and art) that I ran from home.  I was still helping people but in a different way.  For the first few years, I still worked in offices through a temp service, but then in 1996, I went home-based full-time, and that's the way it's been ever since.  It was so much easier to manage my health care schedule while working at home as opposed to having to trek to an office in the city each day.  I had moderate success with that business and had fun designing the products: resumes, manuscripts, note cards, address labels, and the like.  It wasn't until 2007 that I closed up shop on that venture.  That's when we moved to Utah.

That move spurred big changes in me. I learned to navigate the streets in a city bigger than any I'd ever driven in before.  A huge accomplishment considering I had always been petrified of driving even on country roads.  I also joined a gym, lost 25 pounds and was in the best shape of my life.  I was so impressed with the trainers, my experience, and my results that I decided to get certified as a personal trainer myself.  Many of the trainers at the gym where I worked out were supportive of my decision, helping me study for the exam, asking for updates, cheering me on.  It felt great.

Then I stumbled.  The manager of the gym seemed willing to hire me as a trainer there, but I hadn't applied yet. He kept asking me when I was going to apply.  I said I was going to wait until I got back from a trip back east to visit family.  Why I waited, I have no idea.  This had become a bad habit of mine over the years.  Well, by the time I got back from that trip, that manager was gone.  He'd moved up north to open his own business.  I didn't realize the gravity of my mistake until I applied at the gym and didn't get an interview.  I applied three different times at that gym and several others around town, got a couple interviews at other facilities, but was not hired.  I don't know the actual reason why I wasn't hired, but I have a feeling it was partly due to the fact that I didn't have experience and also didn't fit the cookie-cutter image of the svelte, young, healthy trainer.  Even though many people had told me they would rather work with someone who looked less intimidating and closer to their age, gym managers seemed to have other ideas.  The lesson I took from that was, never, ever pass up a reasonable opportunity that lands in your lap.  I did end up working remotely for that manager friend who had believed in me, blogging and providing customer service for his company. It was something fitness-related at least.

My final fitness position was as a coach for participants of a weight loss drug study.  That lasted almost three years.  I enjoyed coaching the participants who took the time to check in with me, but it was part-time and, honestly, not the type of thing I wanted to do long-term.  After five years of trying to establish myself in the fitness industry, I had had enough.  My heart wasn't in it anymore.  I gained back the weight I'd lost, I was discouraged that nothing I tried seemed to last.  Not knowing what else to do, I wrote content for websites.

Next, I looked into master's degree programs in psychology and certificate programs in play therapy, considering one of my original plans.  Well, the information I found indicated that I would probably have to take a heap of psychology courses to start, since I hadn't taken many in college years earlier, then I'd have to get my master's degrees in psychology or related field, and then get certified in play therapy, plus licencing exams, etc, etc.  It added up to almost 10 years of education when all was said and done.  I was 50 at the time.  There was no way I was going to invest all that time and money for a career that might last 10 years, tops.  If I had gone for it in my 30s, sure.  But I wasn't prepared to take on such a big project in my 50s.  It's doable, for sure.  There are people who tackle it in their 70s and 80s.  It just wasn't something I was willing to take on.  

Then in 2014, I heard about life coaching.  Curious, I did some research.  It sounded perfect for me.  I could get certified in a reasonable amount of time for a reasonable fee, and work at home helping people!  I was over the moon.  I loved the study materials, the practice coaching, and meeting other coaches who had the same passion for helping others that I did.  

When it came time to choose my niche, one popped into my head immediately:  special needs.  I added "abilities" to it as well because I wanted to key on the positive; what clients can do, rather than what they can't.  By focusing on special needs/abilities coaching, I am able to bring all the knowledge and experience I've gained throughout my life to each session in order to help guide people with health issues as they navigate the sometimes confusing, sometimes frightening medical world.  But not only that.  I provide guidance to clients dealing with societal issues as well.  There are those in the world at large who sometimes forget that we're all human, including those with special needs; we're all able to contribute to society in a variety of ways, big and small, and we should be respectfully allowed to do so to our full potential.    

Always keep a look out for opportunities you view as potentially rewarding and fulfilling. Grab them, and hold on tight.

Are You a Country or City Person?

Photo of the Welcome to Las Vegas sign my hubby took recently.

I used to dream of moving to a high rise apartment in a big city.  Chicago.  New York.  LA.  Didn't matter where, really.  I was brought up in the country on a dairy farm.  It was a beautiful area, surrounded by rolling hills, gurgling streams, shimmering lakes, and miles of green (ah, but winter, that's another story, and one of the reasons I live in the desert now).  I felt safe, maybe too safe.  All I wanted to do was go; get away to a more "exciting" life.  Maybe get lost in the sea of people there where I could be myself and no one would take notice.  Or maybe someone would notice me and I'd love it.  I did tend to fantasize about making it big, being a star.  Haven't we all done that at some point?

Now I couldn't imagine living in a sprawling or towering metropolis.  I don't fancy living in the country either, although I love going for hikes in the mountains, and breathing in the fresh air and sharp yet sweet scent of pine.  I prefer living in the smallish city where I am now.  I can get the medical care I need, enjoy the 300+ days of sunshine we get each year, take in the vibrant local arts scene, shop for most things I need, and for the rest Las Vegas isn't that far away.  I can get anything there, including many things I'd rather not!  Each time I approach Vegas, the hair at the back of my neck stands up, I become very aware of my surroundings, and I'm constantly on guard.  There is definitely a big city vibe going on there.  I couldn't live like that every day.  I don't think I could get used to it either.  Although I wouldn't want to live in the country again, I am a farm girl at heart.  I don't like how I feel in any big city--nervous, closed in, crowded out, hurried.

Me at my favorite spot on the shores of Lake Champlain, 2009.

That's okay, though.  Things change; circumstance, health, ideals, opinions, perferences--they all change over time.  It's better to change, in my opinion, than hold steadfastly to the norm that is keeping me stuck, stifling me.

Which are you, country or city?  Have you always been?  Have you changed your preference over the years? 

Over-Thinking, Part 1: Doctor's Visits

Do you over-think about upcoming doctor's appointments?  My latest video offers tips on how to calm your mind.  I hope it's helpful.