Vlog: Daydreaming Pros and Cons

I have used daydreaming for stress relief for most of my life:  from about age 8 years to my early 20s.  I've used it since then as well, just not as much.  I probably used it too much as an escape early on, but I truly do feel that it helped me cope.

There are pros and cons associated with daydreaming.  

First, the Pros:

• Helps you get creative:  I do this with writing, disappearing into that world--getting into "the zone."  Creativity can also help you relax, find new solutions to problems you may never have thought of otherwise.
• Helps you understand where someone is coming from; empathize:  Daydreaming can help you think how it is for your family and friends when you have to cancel due to health issues or some other reason.  It can also help you feel more connected to those family and friends who live far away. Research shows that daydreaming/fantasizing can cause similar reactions to those you would experience in reality while in the same situations.  Excited.  Frightened.  Calm.  Refreshed.  Sad.  How cool is that?
• De-stress through letting go:  Giving yourself a little break from constant worry, medication schedules, doctors' appointments, physical therapy and so on by daydreaming.  It can aid healing and improve your wellness by boosting your immune system and the overall way you feel.
• Clarity and better memory:  Daydreaming can help you think more clearly and better remember new information.  This is excellent news for those of you who are facing meeting a new doctor or new diagnosis.  For planning, organizing and performance at work, too.  Use it to go into any new situations with more confidence.  

Now, the Cons:

• Distraction:  Daydreaming can take your attention away from learning, work, chores, family, and so on.  It makes retrieving information more difficult, say, if you're reading or taking a test.
• Unhappiness:  If you daydream about negative things you could become more unhappy.  If you daydream about positive things, it doesn't seem to help you become happier.  It all depends on your view of your daydream experience and the topic.  Go into it realizing that it is only a tool that can help you temporarily zone out and relieve stress.  Use it for good rather than bad.  
• Staying in a dream world:  If you stay in the dream world and can't function in the real one; if you avoid socializing with friends and family, chronically miss work or school to spend time daydreaming, it's important for you to recognize this as unhealthy and seek help from a healthcare professional.    
• Putting people on a pedestal: If you imagine a person to be a certain way in your daydreams, it could negatively affect your life and even be dangerous.  For example, if you're in an abusive relationship and disappear into your daydreams as an escape, and while there imagine that the person is really amazing and loving, and then come back to reality and convince yourself that this same person is really kind and deserves your love even though they are abusive toward you, that is not healthy.  On the flip side, you could also go into your dream world and imagine doing terrible things to someone in your life you dislike strongly, although they are basically a decent person. That will not help foster understanding or a healthy relationship with that person in reality.

You absolutely can learn to use daydreaming as a tool to get you through the tough times.  Just remember to use it for good and not stay there.  

Do you use daydreaming to cope with chronic health issues or other problems?  Has it hurt?  Has it helped?  Let me know.  Thanks.  See you back here next week.  

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Frontiers in Psychology:  Pros and Cons of a Wandering Mind: A Prospective Study

  

Memory of a Thunderstorm

My reaction to Florida thunderstorm--August 21, 1993.
Originally from a video.  Sorry about the poor quality.

Ever since I can remember, I have not liked thunderstorms.  No, let me rephrase that.  I have always been petrified of thunderstorms.  When I was a kid, I laid on the couch with my head covered in pillows whenever a thunderstorm came along.  Even with a house full of people all around me!  

My most harrowing experience with a thunderstorm came when we lived in Orlando, Florida in the early 1990s.  Jim and I decided to take a walk at one of our favorite nature centers (Osceola County Schools).  It was near Kissimmee.  There were boardwalks meadering through lush tropical vegetation.  By the time we got there, the clouds in the sky were that bluish grey that always means trouble is coming.  I even heard a rumble of thunder in the distance.  But Jim convinced me we had time for a walk.

Ha!  We got halfway down the path when the heavens open up.  The rain poured down and the thunder was deafening.  I totally panicked.  I wanted to turn around, but Jim said it was too far to walk back to the car.  We'd have to find some sort of shelter where we could wait out the storm.

We came across a covered overlook by a pond.  No sides, just a roof and support beams.  Oh lovely.  And we were right on the water, one of the worst places to be in the thunderstorm.

I sat on a bench there, covering my ears and praying that I wouldn't be hit by lightning, while Jim delighted in taking videos of the storm.  Jim loves thunderstorms.  He finds them fascinating.  I...do not.  I find them dangerous and frightening.  Whenever there is even a hint of a storm on the horizon, my heart pounds, I start sweating, I unplug electrical appliances, shut windows, and run for cover.  Well, I couldn't do that out in the middle of the park.  So, I just sat there with my eyes closed and feared the worst.  

The rain pelted the usually serene pond, as the wind howled through the trees, and the thunder reverberated off the roof overhead.  Lightning bolts hit all around us.  I was in hell.  I willed the storm to stop, just stop, but it went on for at least an hour. 

And we survived it.  Ahhh!  Relief!

I got my fear of thunderstorms from my dad.  As he was milking cows in the barn on the family farm as a youngster, the barn was hit by lightning, electrocuting the cow he was tending to at the time.  The cow fell on top of him.  For the rest of his life, my dad was also petrified of thunderstorms.  He was a workaholic, but he would not milk the cows if it was storming.  Everyone stayed safely in the house until the storm blew over.

I've gotten better at dealing with storms over the years.  I still do not like them one bit, but I no longer cover my head with pillows at the first sign of a "thunder boomer."  I go about my business, for the most part, but stay inside.  Jim heads for the windows, and sometimes outside, to check out the sky, the clouds, the wonder of the storm.

Thunderstorms are a part of life during the spring and summer months.  We just have to deal with them.  Don't let them take the fun out of life.  If thunderstorms leave you paralyzed with fear, you might want seek help from a qualified professional to get some relief.  

So, do you love thunderstorms or hate them?  Do you spend time worrying about them or looking forward to them all winter?  Have you ever gotten caught in one?  I'd love to hear about your adventure.