Keeping the Peace

 

I've been thinking a lot lately about hot topics such as politics and religion and how best to act when confronted with them in a social setting.  Political and religious views are a part of life.  They are very personal.  It's easy to get hot and bothered when discussing them.  And it's also easy to get very uncomfortable when people start talking politics and religion in mixed company.  The solution?  Here's a link to an article from the  Psychology Today blog, Resolution, Not Conflict by Susan Heitler, Ph.D.  Dr. Heitler gives some good tips on how to handle this type of situation.  She specifically keys on politics, but her suggestions can also be helpful when dealing with other controversial issues and difficult circumstances.

 

I agree with Dr. Heitler's views, although I do find myself wishing I could just blurt out, "Let's not talk about that,"  or, when I'm particularly upset with someone over what I would consider a rude comment, "Get over yourself and show some respect, please."  I think it's inappropriate to talk about hot topics in mixed company--different faiths, ethnicities, political ideologies, races, genders, and the like--, and especially if you're talking to someone you just met.  But Dr. Heitler has it right.  If a controversial topic does come up, it's best not to ruffle feathers or start a debate. 

 

How about you?  Do you agree with Dr. Heitler or would you handle it a different way?  Let me know in the comment section below, or email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com.  Thanks!  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Come on and Shake Those Blahs

Do you have the blahs?  They don't just happen in winter.  They can happen anytime, set off by a loss of a loved one, health problems, work woes, a spiritual crisis and more.  A string of little, seemingly insignificant things that bugs you could trigger the blahs, too.  So, how do you  shake these pesky feelings?  Here are some tips:

 

1.  Call a trusted friend.  Talking to someone about your blahs, or simply talking to them about anything, may boost your spirits, depending on if you would like to try to remedy the situation by venting and asking for advice, or by attempting to forget about it for awhile.  Either way, a good talk can help.

 

2.  Change your living space.  Sometimes little changes can help shake us out of a downer mood.  Rearrange the furniture, add some house plants or a pretty bouquet of flowers, or frame some personal photographs to hang on the walls--anything that can perk up your personal space.

 

3.  Try a new hobby.  Shake things up by trying a new hobby.  Pick something you've always wanted to try but never made time for before.  Maybe you've always wanted to take piano lessons, or take a ceramics class, or collect antique radios.  Give it a whirl and you might find your spirits starting to soar.

 

4.  Join a club.  You may find relief by joining a club either locally or online.  What are you interested in?  What would you like to learn about?  The Internet provides many opportunities to get together with others with similar interests.  Seek out related clubs, attend open houses, become a member, or start your own club.  

 

5.  Exercise.  Whether you work out at home, the neighborhood park, or the gym, regular exercise is a great way to boost your mood.  Find the time, place, exercises, and activities that work best for you.  If you enjoy your workout routine, you'll be more apt to stick with it.  If you're new to exercise, remember to take it slowly at first.  Ease into it.  Always exercise smart and safely.

 

6.  Scratch something off your bucket list.  Is there something that you haven't done that you'd like to do during your lifetime?  Well, maybe now is the time to give it a go.  Accomplishing a long-held goal can recharge your batteries, big time.  Maybe you'd like to travel to your ancestral homeland, learn to swim, write a memoir, or hike the Appalachian Trail. Start preparing for this adventure, really dig into it, and have fun.

 

7.  Play games you enjoyed as a kid.  Sometimes bringing out the kid in yourself can help boost your spirits.  Games are a great way to do it.  What games did you enjoy as a child?  Some examples:  Hopscotch, Hide and Seek, Tag, and Simon Says.  What others can you think of?  I've been tempted to break out Twister.  Am I still flexible enough to play it?  I'll just have to try it and find out.  Give your favorites a try, too.  Have fun and let yourself be a little goofy.

 

8.  Volunteer.  To me, there is no better way to help conquer the blahs than to get out into the community and volunteer.  Help a neighbor move, deliver flowers to patients at the hospital, read to nursing home residents, raise money for a favorite charity, take dogs for a walk at the local animal shelter--the list of possibilities is endless.  Go to it!

 

9.  Join a support group.  Joining a support group related to something that is contributing to your blahs can help you find some relief.  Talking to others in similar circumstances can help you deal with yours.  This can really help those of you who may feel you are alone in the world; that no one understands what you're going through.  There are empty nester, new mother, exercise, and griever's groups, to name a few.  Check your local newspaper, or ask your doctor for information specific to your needs.  

 

10.  Distance yourself from friends and family.  Okay, now I don't mean ditch them altogether; not necessarily.  But if you find you don't have a lot in common with a current friend or group of friends, or you feel a bit smothered by your family, it might be time to back off a bit.  And if you end up seeing them less and less over time, that's telling you something.  It might be time to make some new friends who may actually treat you more like family than your blood relatives do.  Do what feels right to you, and avoid feeling guilty about it.  Change is good.  This may be a temporary change or a long-term one, but if it feels good in your gut, it's good for you.  Listen to yourself and what you really need to make your life the best it can be.

 

11.  Move.  This is a more drastic approach, but if you feel it's right for you and you can realistically make it happen, go for it.  Whether it's across town or across the world, a move can do you good.  Moving can recharge your batteries.  That's what happened to Jim and me.  The move across the country to Utah was a great decision for us.  We are more active since the weather is nice year round, I'm not afraid to drive here since I don't have to deal with icy roads,  (Well, we do get snow now and then, but not often.  I just don't go out if the roads are icy.) and we've gotten more involved in community than we ever have anywhere else we've lived.     

 

12.  Change Jobs.  Sometimes jobs can get boring if you're doing the same thing day in and day out.  Or you may no long find your current career rewarding.  If a change in attitude or a promotion isn't in the cards, it may be time to look for another job.  Be patient.  It may take awhile to transition to a new job.  Consider the possibilities, decide what you are good at and what you love to do, seek the help of a career counselor, look into educational requirements for your new career choice(s), scope out job opportunities in your chosen field, and make it happen.  

 

13.  Act the way you want to feel.  This is one of Gretchen Rubin's 12 Personal Commandments.  If you act the way you want to feel, you could go a long way toward kicking the blahs.  Of course, if you have the blahs, it takes determination and resolve to attempt to snap out of them.  But give this trick a try.  Say you're invited to a game party and you just can't muster the energy to go.  You may also be on this tropical vacation with your whole family and you're the only one who is not one bit interested in playing in the ocean or relaxing on the beach.  Family reunions, the theatre, hiking, watching a movie, playing dress up with the kids--whatever it is, you're just not in the mood.  Dig deep and, instead of moping around, find a way to act the way you want to feel.  You want to feel happy at least, but try to work up to energized and fabulous if you can.  It just might work wonders for you.

 

If you aren't seeing any relief from trying these tips, contact your doctor for a physical exam.  If your mood is related to a health condition, talk it over.  Sometimes getting the answers to your questions can bring relief.  Even if your doctor gives you bad news, at least you'll know what's going on.  The sooner you see about it, the better chance you'll have of finding a solution to your problem, whether it's medication, surgery, dietiary changes, psychotherapy, or some combination of these.  

 

If you try these tips, I'd love to hear how it worked out.  You can post a message below or email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com.  Take care.

 

 

Chair Aerobics

In a recent post I talked about ways to sit less.  But then I thought, well, what about exercise for someone who uses a wheelchair or has trouble standing for any length of time?  When I was a growing up, I used a wheelchair quite often.  To exercise, I danced while seated, moving to the beat of the music; pumping my fists, raising my arms, kicking and stomping my feet, and so on. I had a ball and got a pretty decent workout besides.  Wall push ups, leg extensions, and leg curls are other options.  You can do that, too.  Make up your own routines to suit your mobility, ability, flexibility, and fitness level.  Make it fun.  But were there any videos available with organized aerobic programs?  

I searched Amazon.com and found a few choices available.  The one I chose to order was Chair Aerobics for Everyone on DVD.  I was so impressed with how good a workout I got from this DVD! I worked up a sweat and my muscles felt like they had had a really good workout.  The DVD includes cardio, free weight, and circuit training, and someone from the group always does a regressed version, so you can do the workouts regardless of your fitness level.  The DVD separates workouts into chapters, so I played them individually first until I got the hang of the routines.  If you're looking for a longer workout, choose to play all the segments.  The instructor of this aerobic workout is experienced and keeps things moving at a good pace.

This is a great workout for those who aren't able to stand--or stand for a long period of time--while exercising, have limited space at home or work, or are new to exercise.  You can get toned, burn fat, boost your energy, and have a great time doing it.  

Remember to ask your doctor before starting any new exercise program.  Always exercise safely, stay hydrated, and stop if you have trouble breathing or experience sharp pain.  

  

Know When to Back Off

I've seen many posters online with saying such as "No pain, no gain," and "I'd rather suffer the pain of a workout than the pain of humiliation and regret from not working out."  I've read a lot of comments along the same lines from trainers on the Internet.  Don't buy it.

Sure, if you're sore after your workout--even a couple days after--that's okay.  You've been working your muscles; some soreness can be expected.  But never, ever work out through sharp, throbbing pain.  It's not safe, it's not worth the damage it could cause, and it's just not smart.

It's difficult to stop when you're on a roll.  I get that.  You're getting into your workout, you're psyched, you're energized and feeling pretty good about yourself.  But then, it happens.  You feel something snap, feel a sharp pain run though your body.  Aw, come on!  You think maybe you'll be fine.  You just need to shake it out.  But that doesn't work.  

It's time to stop.  

I've experienced two such occasions recently: 

1)  About a month ago, I got new shoes.  I eased into wearing them, and put bandaids on areas of my feet prone to blisters whenever I wore the new shoes.  Well, that didn't seem to work this time around.  One day I took off my shoes and socks to find a big, nasty blister on the side of my left foot.  I had been planning to walk with a friend at lunchtime that week, but she suggested we postpone it because of the blister.  I was bummed.  I'd recently gotten back into walking regularly and was just starting to hit my stride again.  But I knew that I needed to back off.  I'd had a lot of health issues--some involving my feet--over the years.  I knew not to press me luck.  

2)  I'd worked my way back to walking with Leslie Sansone DVDs.  I could work out at my own pace and slowly get myself back up to speed in the comfort of home.  I could sit down when I felt like my foot needed a rest.  It worked well.  Although the blister is still healing (the doctor said it would possibly take three weeks, which is where I'm at right now.  Time to call him back, I think.), I was feeling pretty good about my progress.  And I liked that Jim joined me for the work out sessions sometimes, too.  Then yesterday I wrenched my knee--somehow.  No clue how.  Now I'll be walking along just fine and then my knee gives out.  Yow!  Not a pretty picture.  Yep, it hurts.  And it comes out of no where.  I don't know when it will happen next.  Oh, the frustration!  So, now I'm benched again for the time being, until the knee feels better.  Maybe I'll put some Icy Hot on it.  Does anyone else out there use that stuff for pain?  I'll use regular ice and heat on injuries, too, but lately I've been going to Icy Hot.  I don't like to over-use any medications, whether over-the-counter, prescription, or natural.  They all have potential side effects.  But I do tend to grab Icy Hot when I have pain that is enough to potentially keep me up at night.

Hopefully both problems will pass soon, so I can get back to my cardio workouts.  Working the muscles, raising the heart rate, and working up a sweat feel great.  It's a feeling that I don't want to go without for long.

If you experience pain, stop immediately.  The longer you work out with an injury, the worse it can get.  Take the time you need to rest and recover, and be sure to seek medical attention if the sharp pain continues or gets worse, you experience streaky redness and/or swelling in the injured area, or fever develops.

Have you worked out with an injury?  Let me know what happened as a result.  Let's talk about it. I'd love to hear from you.

Sit Less, Move More

 

Sitting too much is a big problem in our society.  We're busy, for sure, but we do a lot of busy work sitting down.  Here are examples of when we sit the most, and possible alternatives.  

Talking on the Phone:  Whether at work, at home, or in the car, we're often sedentary while talking on the phone, although I've also seen many people walking through airports, down sidewalks, and through malls with a phone glued to their ear.  That's a whole different topic in and of itself.  I'll save that for another blog post.  For now, let's concentrate on a alternatives to sitting and talking on the phone.  At work, you could pace back and forth in your office, deliver a report in person to a coworker, or stand and do stretches.  At home, try walking around your house, doing squats, or taking a walk outside.  In the car, well, you could pull over to take or make a call and get out for a good stretch.  If you can't get out of the car, put the cruise control on and wiggle your toes and  "march" in place to help increase the circulation during long commutes on the highway.  

Waiting in the Doctor's Office:  Instead of sitting there reading four-year-old magazines or reading your latest Kindle selection, stand up and walk in place for a bit, do some calf stretches, and then mini squats.  If you would rather not do this little workout in front of a room full of strangers,  then you can take it outside.  Ask at the desk approximately how long the wait will be when you check in.  If you've got 10 minutes or more before the doctor will see you, inform the staff of your plans to walk a bit.  If you see someone you know in the waiting room, invite them to join you.  

Watching Television:  After a long day, you may just feel like lounging on the couch while you watch your favorite television shows.  Rest and sleep are essential for rejuvenation and health.  But if you've been sitting all day, it's important to get up and move any chance you get.  Leave snacks on the kitchen counter so you'll have to get up to get them (um, and don't watch TV in the kitchen).  During each commercial break, do a set of push ups, sit ups, or jumping jacks.  If you have the space, you could even put your treadmill or elliptical in the same room as the TV, so you could get your cardio in while you enjoy your favorite programs.  If you have weights at home, get some strength training in as well.

Surfing the Net:  With all the mobile devices out there today, it can be easy to stand or walk and surf at the same time.  But be aware of your surroundings.  Don't go bumping into, cutting off, or knocking down others just to keep moving and surfing at the same time.  If you're using a laptop or desktop, be sure to take a break every 20 to 30 minutes to get up, stretch, walk around the house or office, feed the cat, take the dog for a walk, fix lunch, have a bathroom break, get some coffee, and so on.  There are plenty of reasons to take those breaks, the most important being your health.

Enjoying Your Hobbies:  It is easy to get caught up in reading your favorite book, or painting your latest masterpiece, or sorting through old photographs to put in a scrapbook, or trying to solve a crossword puzzle.  But you need to get up and move now and then.  You could very well stand to do these things, but standing for a long period of time isn't a good idea either.  You need that movement to keep your body healthy.  Try setting a timer for 20 minutes.  Every 20 minutes make a point to get up out of your seat, walk around, and stretch.  Also, try starting these activities about 30-45 minutes before you need to pick the kids up at school, leave for an important meeting, or prepare for a friend's arrival.  That way, you get some satisfying downtime in, but you're not sitting there for hours on end.  

Hopefully these tips will help you move more and sit less.  I'm always looking for new ideas.  Let me know how you've managed to add more movement to you day.  Comment below or email me at amy@acnlifecoach.com.  Thanks!  Have a great weekend.  And, remember to move!  :-)

How to Get Out of an Exercise Funk

For Throwback Thursday, here's a post from my Making Fitness Fun blog from about a year ago.  Enjoy!  

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Getting into an exercise funk is no fun.  I've been there.  I love being fit, but there have been times when I just didn't feel motivated to work out.  There have also been dark periods when I didn't even want to think about fitness.  I blame that on menopause.  I can't imagine any other reason for me to fall out of love with fitness. 

Luckily, I've always been able to get out of a funk. Because you can't stay in it forever.  It's nonproductive, feels yucky, and the longer you stay in it the harder it will be to get back on track. Here are some things that have helped me to snap out of it.  Use what works, chuck out the rest.  The important thing is that you get moving again.  

1.  Ask Yourself What the Problem Is.  You can't fix something if you don't know what's wrong.  What's the root of your funk?  Did someone make fun of you at the gym?  Are you overwhelmed by the terminology that your trainer is throwing at you?  Dig deep to find out what is causing this lack of motivation, fuzzy-headedness, blah feeling--whatever your funk encompasses.

2.  Go About Trying to Solve the Problem.  Write down the problem and what you may be able to do to solve it.  Say it's that people make fun of you at the gym.  Let the gym manager know what's going on.  He or she may approach the bullies, get their story, and tell them to stop or risk being kicked out.  Each gym has its own policies regarding such matters, but I would think that most gyms would have a zero tolerance policy as far as harrassment goes.

3.  Revise Your Goals. Revising your goals can help re-energize you and smash those barriers.  Don't try to be a hot shot athlete if it's not in you.  Shoot for losing 1 pound, 5 pounds, or even 10 lbs.  Or you could set a goal to run a mile, then work your way up to a 5K.  Similarly, set a goal to increase the weight you lift by 2 lbs. or up your reps by 5 (or by just 1; come on, one rep, you can do it.) in a week or so--whatever feels right for you. Challenge yourself to help put the fun back in your workout.  Don't expect to be able to start back at your previous fitness level if you have been away from fitness for more than a couple weeks.  Start back slowly; work back up to your previous level and then shoot for more.

4. Choose Activities You Enjoy.  What do you like to do?  Play cards, play Yahzee, garden, walk, play tennis?  Great, do it!  Okay, so playing cards and Yahtzee aren't exactly the most acitive pasttimes, but you could work them into your program.  Never mind that they aren't the usual exercise choices.  Maybe that's the problem.  You may need to shake things up; become creative when designing workouts to put the zip back into your program.  For instance, you may enjoy picking a card from a deck before each exercise in your program. The number can represent the number of reps, while the suit can represent the sets.  

5. Manage Stress.  If you're feeling pressured about things in your daily life including family matters, community obligations, bills, and so on, your workout could suffer.  It can put a dent in your enthusiasm and time for exercise.  But keep in mind that exercise can actually help relieve stress, so make sure you take time to fit in fitness.  Make time for yourself.  Consider meditating, getting more sleep, or talking to a close friend or family member to get things off your chest.  If that's not enough, consult a financial advisor, your doctor, or other professionals for more expert advice.

6.  Don't Over-Think Things.  This happened to me.  The more I learned about fitness, the more confused I got. I felt like I had to work out  a certain way, design programs a certain way, go by the book.  Then I heard from a trainer that I admired that she made her own programs specific to the clients' needs, not by instructions in a book.  Yes, we need to learn theory, anatomy, physiology, programming, etc., when studying to be certified personal trainers, but we also have to loosen up a bit and go with our guts,  and a client's preferences and fitness level rather than a textbook when deciding what's best for a client. It's similar to what doctors have said about me regarding my history of spina bifida:  "You're not 'textbook'." When it comes to training, I don't think of anyone as textbook.  All clients have individual needs.  When I stopped over-thinking and started concentrating on the exercises I liked to do and had fun with, I felt much better.  Workouts were fun again.

7.  Leave Work at Work.  If you've got a lot on your plate at work it may be hard to let it go and concentrate on your workout, but you need to.  Workouts are great for helping you relax and keep your mind off work.  Don't fight that.  You need this facet of your life to help you decompress. Don't stew about work issues.  Clear your mind, relax, have fun.

8.  Think Positively.  No matter what is going wrong there are probably a lot of things going right, too.  Take a moment to realize that.  Each night before you go to bed, make sure to write down three positive things that happened that day.  Remember to include any fitness time you managed to squeeze in and if you grabbed a healthy snack instead of caving in and having that sugary soft drink or donut.  Think of how it felt when you were at the top of your program, kickin' butt at the gym.  You did it then; you can do it again.  Focus on your strengths and build on them. Then tackle your weaknesses.

9.  Concentrate on the Present.  So, you messed up that workout; you missed a jogging date with your best friend.  It's done.  It's over.  Leave it behind.  A good way to put it behind you is to start over.  Concentrate on the present.  Try that exercise you goofed up on again.  Take it slow.  Master it.  Call your friend to set up another jogging date and make sure to arrive early.  Don't let the past control you; rather, control your present.

10.  Stick to a Schedule. You have a better chance of making your workouts if you schedule them into your  day.  Working out early in the morning is great.  You get it in before the day gets crazy.  But I can't seem to exercise in the morning.  I get up early for work as it is, so getting up earlier to fit in exercise just doesn't cut it.  So, I usually have to wait until the afternoon.  One time of the day I hate working out is in the evening.  I'm too tired, plus I don't know anyone who goes to the gym at that time.  Do cardio most days of the week and weight training at least two days per week.  And allow for rest intervals during your workout as well as on off days to help your body recover.  Overtraining increases the risk of injury, so, yes, challenge yourself, but don't go overboard.

11.  Accept Off Days.  Maybe you're having an off day, but that doesn't mean you have to turn it into a full-blown funk.  Use these to re-energize yourself rather than kick yourself down. Come back more determined than ever to better your technique, increase your sets or reps, and up the weight your lift.